The relationship between siblings

This morning I had the pleasure of waking to my beautiful children hugging once again they were loving on each other and telling each other how much they will miss each other while at school today. Cadence told Caitlin to have a wonderful and exciting day at school just before her little sister got on the bus. I continued helping Cadence with her hair before I took her on in for her big, wonderful, and exciting day at her school.

As I brushed her hair I remembered what I watched the other night on Oprah's Master Class series. She had Diane Sawyer talking about her life and a small bit of her childhood that shaped her into who she was and instead of her father asking if she learned a lot today (at school) he would ask "did you ask a lot of big, important questions?" So this morning when Cadence got out of the car I told her to ask a lot of big important questions, because I too realized that it isn't about what the teachers always wants to teach but about getting our children involved in the learning/ teaching process.

Cadence lets me know everyday just how much learning and teaching is so important to shape our children. She loves to learn, but more important than that she loves to teach. She teaches her little sister so much and just about every minute of the day she makes sure that she is doing that, not just for Caitlin but for her self she understands to be a great teacher we must have to be  great student. I see so much love between these two siblings and as a parent of both I have the job to allow that loving relationship to branch off and become stronger. When one of them has a moment of anger and one hits the other, now who ever hits will take complete care of that sibling for the rest of the night. I don't want to teach our actions are wrong or bad, I want to teach how we control those emotions and how to care for one another instead of making one feel less important then the other.

On a day where my own brother has taken steps to delete me out of his life I now see that when we get hit we don't hit back. If he wants to delete me from his life then he can, the only tie we have to each other is the one we think we have. I use to think I only had one brother but I don't I have millions and I have hundreds who live in my own city. He needs to take me out so he can put another women in his life and I learned when I feel I need him I am lacking something within.

I don't lack within because I do realize completely that I don't need him and I haven't for a long time and that is what the relationship between siblings is about, it is showing us that we are complete they are just a mirror of what we think we need or don't need. So to my brother I release you to be who you are; I will no longer trap you in my mirror.

God lives in the childs smiles

Yesterday was a wonderful day with family and friends. So I must go into how this day went with so much flow!

Cadence looked at us and asked "can you turn that down I can't hear my movie?" I am laughing so hard just thinking about what I was about to say next that I just couldn't contain myself. I tell her "Cadence, eat with your left hand and put your right finger in the ear that doesn't have the headphone in it." OMG that child gave me such a look, I will call it the crazy eye and I hear this meek "man mommy is so silly." I am now crying because I am laughing so hard, it was Caitlin just being Caitlin and that made it even funnier.

When we think that we have to force a perfect night with our children we just lost. We had a perfect night with our children and nothing was forced. I walked around the corner making the girls think I was getting something but then when their guard was down I would scare them, they would go running and screaming and nothing about that was forced, I didn't even have to do the running lol. When I wanted to sit I did and when the girls would walk up to me I would have my head held down; then growl and that's all it took to have them laughing and running about.

 Parents find themselves begging children to go to bed, begging to get things together and even to get ready for bed. I found so perfectly and clearly last night that when we connect back to them there is no begging, they go so easy they want to go because for my girls they are the first ones to not want to disappoint and they go so far these days to call these good nights, and they both go to bed saying this was such a good night lets have another tomorrow. I love that about them! So they do go to bed and on time and they wake up so loving, I walked in this morning and they were hugging and talking about how they will get to go to the same school in two years.

They both got ready today with smiles on their face, they both did what was asked and never showed a sign of upset. So happy they were and are and it is through their smiles that God lives this isn't just something I type to the reader I tell my girls each and everyday just how we live in flow and smile with God how life will just BE so abundant for us and it is already that way for THEM.

Enjoy your day and when you see a child smile today smile back at the God that is in them and feel your smile with your heart this is how our earth beings to heal :)

Chet (Life) is like a bike, how Cadence told me all about Chet today

Well I started my day meditating on the Hebrew letter Chet to see what it would bring me today, I saw the letter turn into a little girl and she started to ride a tricycle down a sidewalk. This I would later find out was to show how life is balanced.

Now on to where Cadence comes in, I was cooking and she was skipping around the house and ran into the kitchen where she begins to tell me "Did you know that life is like riding a bike with a bad wheel; sometimes you can ride it with it broken but sometimes you can fix it and go on your way even better"! I was so shocked it was a random thing that came out f her mouth. LOL like most things are with her! So I asked what happened at school she laughed said nothing, I asked did someone tell you that, she laughed said no. I asked where did that come from, she laughed said nowhere and ran out of the kitchen.

So every time you look at your child and think that you are the ones to teach them anything think again and you'll begin to realize how much they know and are ready to teach us. All it takes is an open ear and time for them you'll be amazed how you will learn.


Have the best CHET everyday!!!!!!!  יש את החיים הכי יומיומיים

Spending time with our children

So as I was thinking and talking about what I would blog about tonight I was drawing a blank, my friend asked what I learned from Cadence today? So here goes, as I suddenly felt a heavy heart and had a quick jolt of sadness I said out loud that I haven't had time with her today, I really haven't seen or talked to her. My heart hurt now I am sure I kept this within myself very well and I was able to not skip a beep but I did quickly get my blog for today.

Now for me I have always had to have quite alone time, but I have also always want people around. I'm not great with balance in this, and neither is Cadence she tells me some nights "I didn't get to spend alone time with you." and to that I always had to remind her that she is the one who didn't want her friends to leave. So now onto tonight once a week we have pizza and movie night with another family and I have felt so out of it tonight, my mind is all over the place, I feel moody, I feel like talking and not like talking, I feel bi-polar tonight and really all day, I could have slept all day.

When I was asked by my friend and not just a friend she is someone who really knows me what Cadence taught me I had a moment of she taught me something last year that I am now just getting. She showed me that we learn from each other when we are close and learning, when we are apart there is no lesson to be learned only how to be apart.

You do things to make you happy no one else?

The picture tells the story of what I am about to write:


I was told last night while getting Cadence ready that she wanted to wear what she wanted to wear to the Christmas program to make her happy not me or her father. I realized that asking her to wear what I wanted to this program was forcing my ideals onto her, but man when your a parent of such a beautiful child it is so hard to just let them go as they please. Because she is so beautiful I try so hard to make her clothes match and be a style that's with the "IN" times; completely wrong of me to do I know and I catch myself a lot with both my girls.

So last night while getting her dressed I had a really cute outfit from a friend that I wanted her to wear, but she saw another outfit from her own friend that really wasn't right for the program but yet she wanted to wear. I told Cadence that I really wanted her to wear my outfit because she was beautiful in it, that purple and gray was her Gandmaws favorite colors (throwing that out normally works), that her father would just love to see her in it. Nothing worked, this smart child looked at me and said it's my program, I have to wear what I want to wear to make myself happy no one else.

I laughed another friend of mine laughed and we couldn't believe how she was so sure of herself with what she said. The thing is she was right on, she no matter what anyone else may think needs to wear or not wear to express herself to make only her happy. A lesson I want her to keep in her life, not something I taught her something she carried with her as she came into this life.

She wore what I asked and was just as happy, she did so not losing her value she still knew what mattered was what she wanted to do or wear to make herself happy. But I think she did wear what I asked because that is the type of child she is, she doesn't want to disappoint us and now I must look at my projections from this to learn what my child already knows!! That we are self fulling at all times, that we make and love ourselves in every situation, that we only matter to the most important people US!!!

How smart are children when we allow them just to be themselves?

So Todd was giving the girls a bath the other day and Cadence was singing "I saw Mommy kissing Santa Clause". He told her that the song was old that he sang that when he was a little boy the next comment was so out of the blue Todd had no words to say to her.
Cadence; hands on her hips "I know before I was born?!"
Todd laughing "Yea before you were you were born"
Cadence "Yup because it takes God a long time to make special people."

Todd laughed and just agreed he had no other words, how many times do we get speechless over what our children say to us? Our children are so smart when we just allow them to be who they are, no one told Cadence how to respond to Todd, she was just allowed to express herself in conversation. Children are so often told, hush, I need quite, I need you to go play, I need, I need, I need, and not once I need to just talk to you about what you want to talk about. Children can help adults get out of the largest problems that adults think they are in. Why? Because children don't think up drama, they see everything easy until we adults tell them is hard. We tell Cadence math is easy and now this 6 year old can add 95+20 when her class is working on doubles, this is easy to Cadence because the people in her life tell her it is so she is able to see it as easy!

We allow our children to express and be themselves and because we do this they are very smart children, when we all adults start aspire to be their children? I aspire every day to be more and more like my girls. The world would have so much unconditional love not when everyone aspires to be their children but when I shift this world would have so much unconditional love just by me and more as more people follow but it starts with me. Like Michael Jackson song "Man in the Mirror". Cadence's favorite song!

I want my "Man in the Mirror" moment and I want my children to be so smart just being themselves, no need for changes anymore its about embracing.

Get ready for Winter Solstice not Chirstmas :-)

For most parents Christmas is a time where they ask children want they want; they get this huge list to give to Santa and then those parents rush out to get as much on the list they can!

So Todd and I ask the girls what they wanted this year and both children gave us a list of three things each. I couldn't believe what had just happened! My girls weren't screaming I want 1 of everything this year. Just 3 things and they weren't 3 things of junk. Both of them really thought about what they asked for and all of the things on their list are educational.

Christmas has become a time of what can I get this year instead of what can I give. Santa was created out of that very thought, a man woke up one morning and said how can I give to children to show they are just as important as other children. When Christmas was around centuries ago it was a pagan holiday for the Winter solstice; they would bring trees into the home for luck during this period. There was no Santa, no snow man, no Christmas lights either. About 25 years later the churches wanted to govern the holiday (solstice) and turn it into a time where they could get more people into stores then tax items higher and earn more money for the churches. This was a time when churches had ownerships in many businesses. When Christmas was turned from a time of understanding the creative energy of the Winter Solstice into a time of Jesus birth (who by all accounts was born in June) we started seeing more people spend money on things that held no value and forgetting all about Jesus. And Jesus was the man who taught others it wasn't about material gain in this world.

Winter Solstice is a time when we understand the moments of creation OUR BIRTHS. When we use the energy of the Winter Solstice for good and for complete grace in our lives this is how we become so blessed by God who gave us this time for a time of reflection. WOW how many times was that said by Jesus, what a neat way to remember his words. Do we really think Jesus would be happy knowing we all got broke as a joke not learning one thing he came to teach us? Now I am not saying we can't give to each other and I am not saying that day needs to be in Jesus name how vain that would be? His teachings should be with everyone daily anyway no special day needed. What I am saying is get your loved ones things they NEED don't go BROKE and look up ways to learn and grow with your family during the Winter Solstice. Google gives tons of ideas on what do to for it and man you may just have some real fun while you grow spiritually. now that's what Jesus would want!

So to my children of 3 gifts, thank you for showing me that Christmas is so much more lol IT IS SO MUCH MORE